The Art of Sending the Perfect DM
In this day and age, a flirty DM is equivalent to sending a drink over to the hottie across the bar; shooting your shot, taking a risk and making a move are all synonymous now with sliding into the DMs.
A step of this caliber is not to be taken lightly. You will either shoot and get a response (score!), or be left on read (swing and a miss). Moves need to be made, carefully. A simple “hi” probably isn’t going to cut it. So, what does a perfect DM look like?
Let’s break it down.
I encourage you first to examine your profile. A profile picture of your car and just your car? Gotta go. A selfie that makes you look like you have 5 chins? Not going to work either.
The key is in the details. You need to create a profile that accurately sums up who you are, without making it seem like you don’t have a life. It’s going to seem pretty weird if you post only pictures of your cat over and over, one kitty pic will suffice.
Now for the actual message itself; nothing too long and nothing too weird.
I spoke with multiple individuals for this article, and most suggested commenting on a Instagram story. This gives you a chance to make a connection about something you two have in common.
Your crush is hiking? You also love hiking and can ask their recommendation for favorite spots to visit!
Your crush is volunteering at the animal shelter? You too have been wanting to get involved in the community!
Humor can be key as well. If you’re funny, showcase that! Make a lighthearted joke.
I’m also a fan of liking a few recent pictures before sending your message to ensure your crush knows they’re on your mind. Think of your conversation like a game of badminton. You hit the birdie to your opponent, and they hit the birdie equally as forceful back to you. You should be able to tell within the first few messages if your crush is interested in holding a conversation.
Do not continue to message someone if they don’t respond, it just comes off as weird and desperate. If your crush didn’t respond after one message, they certainly aren’t going to respond after ten.
The DM interaction also should not continue for too long. A few “hits” back and forth is perfect. You can then choose to end the conversation (for now) and comment on another story later or send a message along the lines of, “I’m getting off here though, let me know if you’re out and about this weekend, my friends and I will be downtown :)”
The eventual transition to texting is crucial and if your crush does contact you again, exchanging numbers should be seamless.
Above all else, don't take it too personal if your crush doesn’t respond! There are plenty of fish in the sea (;